To interview or not to interview …

That's my question now. As I said in the last post, I'm getting my M.A. after finishing with my undergrad. I'd like to get all the experience in education I can before that happens. So I'm busy applying madly to any and all school districts that are a reasonable distance from where I live.

However, this week I have two interviews to go to for communications positions. Should I go to them even though I know I don't want to take those jobs anymore? Even though I know I would quit them if something in the education field came along? I don't think so, but I don't know if that's right. A lot of times I act on gut instinct and my gut is telling me I might regret not going. But this is the same gut that changes its mind all the time and my mind is made up. There is no changing the path from here. I'm doing education.

Why the sudden set path? Why the freak out over never getting hired as a marketer or PR gal? Number one: I'm getting married very soon. Number two: We're probably buying a house (pending owner approval) very shortly after that wedding.

Oh. Sweet. Jesus.

I'm only 21! The marriage thing is fine. We've been together for 3.5 years and getting married is really just showing our families that we're committed to each other. We're legalizing our togetherness.

But the house. The house is freaking me out. The weight of a $1300 mortgage begins to feel very heavy on my shoulders. We sat down and made a budget of what life looks like until I get a job where I make over $6,000 a year and it looks terrible. We bring in about 4k a month. About a third of that goes to the mortgage. Then we budgeted for utilities, food and savings. What's left over is $200 a month for the two of us to entertain ourselves. Oh yeah, that's with a $300 food budget, which breaks to down to $10 a day for the two of us. I need to start clipping coupons. Ugh.

So this is why I'm deciding on a path that gets me to a career that is almost guaranteed. Teachers are needed. Teachers (combined with my fiancee's salary) make a good salary. Teachers get 2 months off a year. Before I was looking for a job that made me completely happy. Now I'm looking for one that would make me happy most of the time and offer some nice perks (summer vacation anyone?)

So, to interview or not to interview. That's now the question.

Just keep swimmin’

Yes. I do like "Finding Nemo." I think Ellen DeGeneres is hysterical. That has nothing to do with this post.

I'm going to stop putting the "next time I'll write about" bits on the ends of these posts. It never works out how I want it to, but that's how it goes when anything has something to do with my career.

So you know how I talked earlier about lowering my expectations for a career? Well, I'm finally going to do it. I had a meltdown last night about how being English major means I'm competing with a bajillion other English majors for a job and how I'm not guaranteed to get any kind of job that offers a living wage. I want to write, but I don't think I'm very good at it. But I found a job that will let me write a few months out of the year.

That's right, teaching. I'm going to finish up my BA in English, then go into the Masters in Education program at Rockhurst university. The program is pretty neat; students only go to night classes and there are four terms per year—fall, spring, summer I and summer II. All told, I can most likely finish my masters in about 2 years of night classes. For right now, I'm going to apply for jobs in education. I've been looking at support staff positions at public schools all around the metro and I'm going to apply like mad. This means, I'll finish out my BA the next two semesters part-time, BUT I'd be working full-time and pulling in about 15k/year. I wouldn't even work for two months with that salary … not bad.

What brought this on? My fiancée pointed out that I always go into something gung-ho and then back off the minute anything goes wrong.

"Just pick something and then go through with it! Through hell or high water, just do it."

Sage advice. And it's what I'm doing. Come hell or high water, I'm getting my M.Ed. in elementary education (and try to get certified to teach in middle school after that). Nothing will stop me. I believe it will be a 70/30 happy/unhappy job. I mean really, I like kids. Being a teacher at that level lets you have more fun with your lesson plans. And if I have a masters I'll get paid more. What's not to like?

It’s hate/really hate relationship

I know I said I would tell you how you know you hate or love your job. But really, am I qualified to do this? I just found out I'm going have a 60/40 split of happiness/unhappiness at my job. And that the hole in my soul that longs to be filled with a warm, glow-y "I'm useful" feeling probably won't be filled by my career. Oh yeah, and that all of my ideals about my job are too idealistic. I'm a little weird. I've been looking forward to my career since third grade. I know that's strange. I never dreamt about the perfect man or my wedding … just about what I'd be doing with my life. My career would equal my life.

Because I've placed so much emphasis on a career, I've been very picky when it comes to jobs. I quit if I hate it; I never stay places for the money. Here are the signs I have when I totally hate a job:

1. I dread going back the second day/after lunch.
   
2. Punching myself in the face and/or boob is a better option than doing my work.
   
3. I want to murder someone in my car after leaving because I'm so angry I have to go back.
   
4. I don't respect my boss.
   
5. I seriously consider living in my parent's basement for the rest of my life rather than face this horrific unhappiness day after day.
   
6. I walk around talking to myself. The conversations are mostly what I would say to my idiot boss and/or co-workers.
   
7. I don't make up a nice sounding excuse when I quit; and I don't feel bad about quitting either.
   

Tomorrow: My phone interview

A quasi-interview

I'm changing the topic today in lieu of a quasi-job interview. I contacted the person at the Student Activities Office of my school to talk about working there. I have an idea that I may like helping to plan stuff for people to do. I like to plan parties, so this seems like it'd be pretty close to that.

I'm a little confused on how to act. This isn't exactly an interview. I e-mailed her to ask if I could get a job there. She told me to come in to talk about an internship. So it sounds like if I want a job, I have it. But I'm not sure how to dress or if it's appropriate to take my resume. We're also going to talk about working in a student activities office for a career, so that's a little informal, right? I think I'll wear jeans and a nice shirt and take my resume. That sounds like it should be right for something this casual.

OK, later! How to know you hate a job or that you love it!

My job history is like a soap opera …

… And if I were to name my job history, I'd name it "All My Joblins" or "(2) Days of My Jobs" (c'mon, get it? Get it? I have way too much time on my hands).

I have no clue in what direction I'm going, but here is the list (as much as I can remember) of what jobs I've had and still have:

• Pizza Hut waitress
  
• Cleric/Kit put-er together-er/Receptionist/Jr. PR person/Office tools fixer (still have this job! Woohooo! 3 years strong!)
  
• Library stocker/Collections Van driver (quit one day after starting.)
  
• Zio's waitress (quit before starting.)
  
• Red Lobster waitress (quit one week after starting, all that corporate hoo-ha really freaked me out.)
  
• Papa John's Delivery Driver (don't do this if you like to work with people, it'll make you want to go postal.)
  
• Office Receptionist (if your boss tells you to do one thing, and the lady in accounting tells you to do another and you do what the lady in accounting told you to because she's standing over your shoulder, and your boss yells at you for it—tell her you did because the lady in accounting told you to. Otherwise you look incredibly stupid and they will fire you.)
  
• Troop Leader for Campfire kids (Loved. This. Job.)
  
• Temp job at Housing and Urban Development Dept. (I sat in an office all day and reorganized files. Then I reorganized the file room. The highlight was when I got to call people and make appointments. Thank god for books on tape.)
  
• Non-profit volunteer (Also a fantastic job, I got to work with kids again. It was the adults who were disappointing.)
  
• Writer for college publication (this is where I started to develop my writing chops and really begin to love writing and researching.)
  
• Academic Essay tutor (Still do this for two people. It's actually really fun and makes me feel useful.)
  
• Newspaper intern (Did a lot of research, but also learned a lot.)
  
• Office Manager (Quit after one week. They wanted me to do bookkeeping.)
  
• Temp office job (Quit at lunch. I felt kind of bad about that one, but it was going to be sitting at a computer for 8 hours a day doing numerical data entry. Sorry people, even books on tape won't get rid of that tension headache.)
  
• Freelance writing (wrote an article for a magazine and am trying to write articles to get published in papers in the area.)
  

So yes, I've had a lot of jobs. I have trouble holding down a job that I really dislike unless I have friends there or there's some kind of reward at the end. I'm starting to figure out what direction I'm going in. … At least I think I am and then I think maybe I'd like interior design. Honestly brain, why do you do this to me?

I'll be out of town over the weekend, but will try to log on and post. Next topic…how to know you love a job, how to know you hate it.

Beginning in the Middle

I went to a career counselor today with the intention of finding out what I'm going to do with my life. Obviously, it didn't work that way or I probably wouldn't be writing this blog. He broke down a lot of idealistic ideas I've had about my future job. For example, I've believed my entire life that my career (not my spouse) would complete me. I would be completely happy in this job, I would be passionate about it and would feel like I was making a difference. He told me that was way too much to expect from a career. I will probably be happy 60 percent of the time in my job and unhappy 40 percent. I would rather it be a 90/10 split, or even 80/20, but if a career counselor says it, it's probably true.

We also discussed my writing. I've been focusing on that since sophomore year (I'm a senior now). He asked why I don't do more of it on my own. I realized I'm very afraid of using all of my free time to write and then failing at it. Like, having everyone tell me I suck majorly. So, here I am.

I want this blog to be about my job search for that job that is at least a 60/40 split. In the last two months, I've already written 10 cover letters, 8 resumes and have had only one callback. It's definitely frustrating and it's even more terrifying to contemplate what will happen after I graduate with a degree in English Lit. What the hell am I going to do with that? Is it useless or multi-purpose? I suppose I'll find that out too.

Tomorrow…All the different types of jobs I've applied for.